Greetings again fellow passengers on the good ole Earth.
Gosh, what's been happening here in my little corner of Oz since yesterday... Not much actually. Oh, wait. I got a telephone call that I would like to share with you...
*ring* *ring* *ring* ring*
me: I guess I'll answer it this time...
me: Hello?
telephone marketer (TM): Hi, is this the so and so household?
me: Well, since there are several of us with that name who live here, then I guess so. May I ask who's calling (dripping some serious sarcasm)?
TM: I'm so and so with foxtel digital (cable tv company), and I talked to you at your door a few weeks ago.
me: No thank you. Goodbye. *click*
Here's what I really wanted to say:
*ring* *ring* *ring* ring*
me: I guess I'll answer it this time...
me: Hello?
telephone marketer (TM): Hi, is this the so and so household?
me: If you don't know who you are calling then you are either trying to sell me something I don't want or trying to take money that I don't have (Note: I've actually said this before to one of these persons).
TM: I'm so and so with foxtel digital (cable tv company), and I talked to you at your door a few weeks ago.
me: No you did not you lying b*stard. I have a sign that specifically says No salesfolk, No religious callers, No charity collectors. And I know for a fact that no one in this household talked to you. Do not ever call here again. *click*
Now, that may sound cold and callous, but we give to many different charities and we buy lots of stuff from local merchants. The sign is up on the door cus otherwise you'd be answering the door ten times a day! I'm serious. The door to door canvassing is a plague down here and the telephone marketing is even worse.
There's a list you can get on nationally of a "do not call with marketing bullshit ever" and I'm going to have our phone number put on it.
I really am nice... HONESTLY!
Alright, I know you are all waiting for part 3 so here ya go:
Makee Breakee part troi (3)
So by now you've figured out that I liked to skate, would skate anywhere, didn't mind the bumps and bruises and sprains that come along with being a kid, and generally had a good time (note, nothing has changed...)
Scene: After school. Older kids (the 5th and 6th graders) were on the hockey rink practicing (pads, helmets and everything) and my older brother was there too since he wanted to be on the hockey team.
Dave is skating on the frozen field next to the hockey rink --this was sooo cool. Once it got cold enough, the school would plow the snow off one of the play grounds and make a huge circular rink by running the hoses on the frozen ground for a day or so. A couple of days later: poof! Instant second skating rink. 3 foot high snow berms and good ice.
So I'm skating around there, it's dark (hey, it's Alaska in the winter time) and there's only a two other skaters there. They both happened to be cute girls. Little dave was way too shy to talk to them, but he sure did try to show off! Remember, I was pretty good. After a while of skating around doing a few lame tricks, I thought of a great idea (I'd have done this whether they were there or not!): I'll get up a bunch of speed and jump over the snowy, icy berm around the pond and land in the soft snow!
I know, you are jealous of the cool ideas little dave gets (they get better as he gets older, stay tuned).
First try: cleared the berm, landed and rolled in the soft snow and came up giggling with a big ole grin on my face! FUN! Gonna do it again.
After about ten times I found I couldn't get as far into the deep snow outside the icy berm as I would've liked. Sooooo... using my skate blades I carefully scraped out a tiny ramp at the base of the icy snow berm.
"I'll clear ten feet for sure with this!" thought little dave.
Skate around to get lots and lots and lots of speed... hit the little ramp at 1000 mph... my feet went straight forward out from under me (picture charlie brown trying to kick the football pulled away by lucy) and I land flat on my back on the hard, knobby, icy snow berm. Actually, my back landed second cus I must have tried to put my left arm out to ease the landing... My forearm hit first about two inches from my wrist and it landed flat onto an big ole hard icy knob.
Ahhhhh, it hurt. A. Lot.
Ok, calm down... you can skate home (1/4 mile) and mom will take care of it cus it's just a sprained wrist.
Little dave attempts to skate across the rink to his backpack, stops after 10 feet, sits down on the ice and SCREAMS in utter agony.
The two girls still didn't come over, but Doug (older brother) and the rest of the hockey team on the other rink did and they called for the coach. Coach looks at my arm, goes inside, and comes out with the teacher most experienced in first aid (he also happened to by my teacher). Mr. Randazzo carefully fits an inflatable splint on the arm to immobilize is for the trip to the hospital. At least, that's what I think happened since my memory is a bit hazy about the specifics --it HURT. It was the worst pain I had ever experienced in my 9 years of living (I've had worse since then, stay tuned).
Coming up next: part 4 --the hospital (not for the first time either, as you know).
Food time!
Yeah, yeah, it's another mushroom soup recipe. But hey, I like shrooms and I like soup. If you don't wanna read it then you don't have to.
shroom soup
What you need:
600 g fresh shrooms --rough chopped
fresh basil
fresh oregano
fresh tarragon
salt
pepper
1/2 cup olive oil
3 tbsp lime juice
2 pinches ginger powder
2 teaspoon dave's olivemite
1 tsp mashed/prepared ginger paste*
1 small onion --minced
3 cups milk
*this, to me, has a high "duh" factor: Peel a few inches of ginger root, finely chop it, then put it and a bit of white wine vinegar and olive oil into a food processor. Process till smooth and put it in a jar. Then (this is the hard part) put the jar into your fridge till you want to use it. Otherwise, you can go to a grocery store and purchase the processed oil, preservative laden, stuff.
What you do:
This is pretty darned easy: chuck all the ingredients EXCEPT the milk into a large saucepan and simmer on low temp till the shrooms are "cooked down" --about 15 mins on low temp. Stir when you need to.
Let it cool, then put it in a blender and add the milk. Then, ah, press the button marked "blend". Pour the mix back into the pan and heat on low heat, stirring every once in a while so the bottom doesn't burn.
It's very yummy!
1 comment:
I hate telemarketers and those door to door people. They won't talk to me because I don't speak swedish...well, I do a little but I pretend that I don't at all.
hehehe
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