Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Holiday Feast 2009 --Keeping It Simple *UPDATED*

Yes, this year I've been told to keep Dave's Annual Super-Awesome Holiday Feast down to a more, shall we say, reasonable level than in years' gone by.

So to help with that, I've started making tofu.

Yes, tofu.

Turns out it's very quick and easy to make! Very cheap too AND you get a big batch of okara leftover to make things like fake burgers, fake roasts, fake pork, fake roast chook... well, you get the idea.

And then there's all the neat things you can do with tofu! Marinate it, smoke it, grill it, stuff it, feed it to someone you don't like... See? There's so much you can do with just some plain soy beans and magnesium chloride!

In fact, I have decided that this years' feast will be meat free and all the meat dishes will be made with my own homemade tofu!





Bullshit.




But I have started making tofu. It will, however, of course, have practically NOTHING to do with any of the food this holiday season.

Many of you may be familiar with my previous menus, many of you may not. Just keep in mind that all but a few dishes on the menu are homemade. By me.

And the pots and pans are home cleaned. By me.

Yes, it's amazing what I go through, sigh...

Oh, if you want to learn how to make any of these, then just lemme know and hopefully one of these recipes will appear (like magic!) on my food blog.

And don't worry, there'll be a funny pic of dave at the end of all this, so please read. And keep in mind that this is meant to be spaced out over 3 weeks. And it's in no particular order. And no food is wasted.


And.

Here.

We.

GO!

holiday feast 2009

stout beer n brats w onions

homemade pizzas

peanut butter cheesecake w/ hot fudge sauce --I've been told if I don't make this each year then I'd better sleep with one eye open.

3 sushi platters

homemade chocolates

homemade tofu, marinated, smoked, grilled, etc.

roast chook w/ all the fixins

baked pumpkin

roasted pumpkin seeds --from the above pumpkin

toasted chilli n garlic almonds & peanuts

pork roast wrapped in banana leaves and slow roasted with polynesian
seasonings.

highland oat cakes

apples n bleu cheese

various homemade cheeses

1 xmas fruitcake

1 xmas pudding

pineapple & maple syrup glazed ham

candied sweet potatoes

fried worms

cinnamon raisin bread

many loaves of white and wholemeal bread

grilled basa fillets

many servings of my extra special chips (thick fries)

advokaat cheesecake

1 bottle of advokaat for above cheesecake

lots of homebrews; stout, lager, dark ale, regular ale, chilli beer, etc.

garden greens salads

marinated fish & onion & cucumber salad

4 kilos of sausage --if we have a pool party

onions for above sausage

1 apricot cobbler

mexican buffet with all the fixin's

champagne n strawberries

green beans n red capsicums w/ bacon & peanut sauce

panforte --awesomely great xmas cake

souvlaki chicken w/ tabouli & tzatziki

devonshire cream tea

pineapple sherbet

pineapple topping

pineapple tarts

pineapple coconut pie

banana jam

charlotte rouse

O'Leary's Irish Cream

brandy

cask of red wine

cask of white wine

shortbread

hot fudge sauce

waldorf salad

herbed, baked spuds

hummus

whipped cream stuffed crepes w/ dark chocolate sauce

*UPDATE!*

How could I forget my Polynesian Hibiscus Water?

*END UPDATE*


See? I've kept it simple this year! Harumph.

And now for a bit of foreshadowing...

foreshadowing

I'm quite sure many questions leap to mind.

"Why is the ladder in the pool?"

"Does dave know about elektrikery and water?"

"Is there a happy ending? Cus I hate sad endings, but in dave's case I'll make an exception."

Why don't YOU come up with your own questions for the pictures and put it in the comments?

6 comments:

scienceguy288 said...

Cue the old stock film reel: "Here, Dave gives us a demonstration of how Not to use power tools!"

dragonfly said...

Cue The Six Million Dollar Man music: "Gentlemen, we can rebuild [insert whatever Dave's rebuilding here]. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first [insert whatever Dave's building here]. Better than it was before. Better, stronger, faster."

(And wow, that's quite the yummy list! I'm glad you didn't put "tofurkey" on it. I must ask, what the heck is chook?)

Fizzgig said...

mmmmm the pool. its gonna snow this week.

i tried tofu at a mongolian place, i mixed it w/my veggies and pasta and its kinda like, shark skin. not that ive eaten it but thats all i could think of. bleh.

la isla d'lisa said...

Dude, you're going awfully far to turn your gutters into a beer bong ...

flying fish said...

fried worms?

Alaskan Dave Down Under said...

sciencebloke: Yup, that'd be right mate. After I watch a few Red Green episodes I'm always inspired to dig out the power tools and duct tape! I'm also working on my own take of "Adventures With Bill". But seriously, the Y chromosome gives us the privilege, nay the RIGHT, to use power tools! Bwuuuhahahahahah!

dragonflying: *sniffle* Ok, you figured me out... I'll go in the corner and hide now.
A chook is aussie slang for chicken.

fizzypop: I'll trade you the snow for the pool, but only for a day! Re tofu: it pics up whatever flavour you cook it in so if you only added it to a dish then it'd be pretty flavourless. My marinated, smoked tofu is to die for! Tastes like teriyaki chicken!

lisa's island: I was pretty sure you'd figure out what I was doing! Good on ya mate.

exocoetidae: Did you know there's a Flying Fish brewery in New Jersey? Now you do. Fried worms: earthworms have the highest protein content of any critter, 72%. Delicacy in China. You can also buy powdered earthworms. When using them fresh though, make sure you remove the intestine but leave all the other goodies (worm gonads are great) before frying. Here's a link to my recipe for frying worms: http://dingodavedelightfullydaringdelicacies.blogspot.com/2009/10/fried-worms.html