This really is a true story! I'm not kidding. It. Happened. Of course I was an undead, brain-eating, sledgehammer weilding zombie at the time, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen.
But first I need to tell you that there'll be a couple of other things in this post. Something about Wifey-Poo will be appearing and this time you get actual photos of The Most Wonderful Woman In The Entire World. Before that though, you get the first act of my Alien Abduction! And before that you get to hear (read) about the tomato season thus far.
To sum up:
Nextly, alien abduction --the beginning!
Lastly, pics of Wifey-Poo.
We planted 11 plants this season. We have so far harvested 592 tomatoes and 135 of them were just this morning. Mmmmmmmmm, tomatoes... drooooooo-al! We eat those tomatoes, if you are wondering.
Is it possible to OD on lycopene? Hmmmm... I've had this urge to go stand barefoot in a plant pot loaded with cow shit and then hang out there all day long in the sun. Of course lately it's gotten even more urgent since I started eating lots of tomatoes.
Maybe it's just me?
Alien Abduction Act One!
It all started one day in the pool. Does that surprise any of you? The story begins on the day of my yearly hat cleaning which, coincidently, coincided with my annual bath (whether I need it or not!). Fortunately it was a warm day otherwise I'dve froze in the pool.
First I had to assemble the necessary stuff:
And of course there's the proper footwear!
Make sure you rinse yourself and the hat BEFORE shampooing
dave gets an idea!
This way I'll clean both the hat and my hair at the same time!
Plop that hat on!
Make sure everything is lathered well:
See? It works!
Always rinse well
Now it's time for the soap! And I have just the perfect applicator:
First, soap the dimpled pool ball well,
and then start scrubbing them thar stinky bits!
Make sure you get all the stinky bits...
No, you really didn't see this. It's a figment of your fertile imagination!
This should give you enough of a lead-in for an alien abduction, I'm sure. Act II will feature something else in the pool which leads to an alien abduction!
No conversation with Wifey-Poo this time. Or as I like to call her, The Most Wonderful Woman In The Entire World! Hey, she puts up with me, doncha know.
A friend of mine from Squarebanks recently found me on twitter and said, "Last we saw of our hero he was heading South with a smoking hot Aussie redhead." I figure these two pics of WP will show what he means.