Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Alien Abduction Act II

By now many of you are wondering just when the hell I'm going to get to the aliens. Just hang about for a bit, no worries. Remember, I still have to die, then turn into a sledgehammer-wielding zombie, then signal the alien ship, wreck havoc on the alien ship (still zombie-ized), get off the ship, and then return to my normal self.

WHEW! Dang, everytime I think about it more memories from the whole thing come flooding back to me wee lil' brain. *shudder*

First though, let's meet Larry, Curly, and Moe.

three long-billed corella cockatoos



Alrighty, back to the Alien Abduction story. Please remember that even though I'm writing this in first person, it is first person in the present tense of something that happened in my recent PAST.


Act II

It was another hot day down unda, so I therefore decided to spend it in the pool, naturally. No, not naturally meaning naked but rather naturally meaning "of course". That's doesn't mean I don't skinny-dip, just not this time.

Ahem

Since bathing and showering in the pool had worked out so well for me in the past, along with dinner, lunch, and brekkie, this seemed like a good time for a shave.

In. The. Pool.

Obviously this momentous occasion called for something more than a little wussy shaving razor blade.

I had this in mind:
shaving in pool 01


Don't worry, I always keep it good and sharp so I don't hurt myself. Much.

Had to assemble all the accoutrements necessary for the task:
shaving in pool 02

Yes, that's only one 750 ml beer. Safety first, ya know!

Hmmmm, this isn't too difficult...
shaving in pool 03



Hey look! It works!
shaving in pool 04



At this point Wifey-Poo was pretty tired of taking pictures of Yours-Truly, not sure why. So she headed on inside to get a bite to eat.

After a while she stopped hearing much splashing about in the pool from me --it's a very rare time when I'm quiet in the pool. I think after about 2 hours she was getting a little bit worried as she hadn't heard any splashing about nor huge cannonball style ker-splooshes from yours truly.

Eventually she started wondering when I was going to start dinner.

She came out to have a look.

*GASP*





FaceDownInTheWater-Bleeding-to-Death




Coming up soon... Alien Abduction Act III: Zombie Among Us!


*********************************************************************

And just to give all you birders out there a shout
one long-billed corella cockatoo


another long-billed corella cockatoo

4 comments:

オテモヤン said...

オナニー
逆援助
SEX
フェラチオ
ソープ
逆援助
出張ホスト
手コキ
おっぱい
フェラチオ
中出し
セックス
デリヘル
包茎
逆援
性欲

scienceguy288 said...

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.......oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Well, enough said. Can't wait to hear the rest of the yarn.

Jim and Heather on Meerkat said...

Oh crap. Just when I was going to tell you to have that Canadian DVD delivered to us and we will ship it to you I find out you slit your throat in your pool. Well if Wifey Poo wants the DVD hopefully she checks your comments and will order the DVD and will have it sent to us. Bummer.

Alaskan Dave Down Under said...

オテモヤン: Ah so, yes I've downloaded the data from the alien spaceship as requested. I'll transfer it via the usual telegenetic micro-dimensional method. Xie, xie.

Sciencebloke: It gets even better and the pics of the aliens are great! True story, dontcha know.

SV Meerkat: Well, I'm now back to my normal self after all the lightning strikes and oxygen deprivation (long story, just keep up with it) so I can now order the DVD. I've got several season of Red Green (my favorite show when I was in Fairbanks) and I found a site in Canada that has the early seasons before he got famous. They only ship to N.A. so thank you muchly for doing the postal go-between!