Chocolate Covered Sarah Palin Legs

Oh damn and darn! I've got a typo in the title of this post. I do apologize, the real title is

Chocolate Covered Spider Legs

Oh me, oh my! Doesn't this sound just deliciously decadent? I mean, come on! Who would want to coat some big ole hairy spiders legs in chocolate? Ummmm, right...

BTW, I've just posted this on my cooking blog, but I thought I'd post it here so all my new readers can enjoy this recipe too. Heck, you don't even need cooking skills. Takes all of 5 mins to make and about 15 mins for the chocolate to set.

It's amazing the recipes you find when you flip through the magazine stand at the supermarket checkout. This is one of those...

Now, I don't really like following things EXACTLY, so first I thought that I'd use the hot fudge sauce from my now world famous Frozen Peanut Butter Cheesecake with Hot Fudge Sauce. But then I remembered my sauce is more fudgy like when it cools, and I need the chocolate to set. Ok, I'll follow their instructions.

Then I thought, "Heck, this is Oz! There's spiders galore. I think I'll go find some." This proved a little more difficult than I had anticipated since I needed really big spiders. I was hoping to find a colony of Huntsman or Wolf spiders. But no, I only found little teeny ones and one of them was drowned in the pool!

See, here's proof (and just click on any of them to see em full screen size):

Hmmmm, he'd be a bit soggy, not very crunchy.


Then I thought of this bloke:

Definitely the right size, but it might be poisonous.


Or how about this one?

Nah, way too pretty. Besides it eats the mosquitos around the pool.

Well, heck! Guess I might as well follow the whole darned recipe, sigh.

Chocolate Covered Spider Legs

What you need:
1 bag of fried noodles, 100 grams (these are them crunchy ones!)
200 grams (almost a POUND) of dark cooking chocolate
2 tbsp of peanut butter (crunchy or not, I used smooth cus I was out of crunchy)

What you do:
This ain't rocket science! First, break the cooking choc into the smallest pieces you can (it melts faster, I'd explain it but it involves Thermodynamics and Latent Heat of Fusion or some such crap) and put the choc and peanut butter in a large microwave proof bowl. Nuke that sucker on high for a min or two. Pull it out, stir it all up. If the choc isn't melted all the way, pop it back in the microwave for 15 to 30 secs.

Once it's all melted, at the bag of fried noodles. Mix it together, but be careful so you don't break the noodles.

Take a plate or cookie sheet and put a piece of wax paper on it. Spoon the chocolately peanuty noodley goodness on to it. I made 14 little piles of spider legs on mine, see:



Pop that tray in the fridge so the chocolate sets.

And then (this is the really clever part) eat them! We'll be having ours for dessert tonight as we watch the season finale of the latest Dr Who (it's the end of a 3 parter)!

Dr Who spoiler alert
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There's a Dr Who spoiler alert approaching...
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It's still approaching...
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Rose is back!

90 in the shade

and it's not even lunchtime yet :)

Ahhhhhhhhh, I do believe that spring might actually be here! Time to put the winter parka away, pack up the bunny boots, and muzzle the mittens.

Yes, spring is here!

Hmmmm, the laundry is only taking 30 mins to dry on the line, nice. The grape vines are sprouting (NICE!!!!), the palm trees are happy, and the pool is clean!

Ahhhhh, spring... 7 months of warm weather!

Now I'll do what every good aussie bloke does in this weather: reach for a tinny! Tinny means beer, BTW.


But oh no! Where'd the beer go?


Now, if'n y'all will 'scuse me, a pool calls to be dived into...

Update: It's now become very cold... it's down to 89.2 F in the shade and only 111.6 in the direct sun. I'm not sure how I'll survive but I think it may be time to break out the showshoes, crampons, and ice axe. Maybe even the ice auger to get through the thick ice on the pool... Sigh...

Sarah Palin Stole My Sunflower!

And don't you all just HATE it when that happens! Hmmmmm, sorta like how she stole all accountability from her governorship of the State Where I'm From.

The first self-seeded sunflower had been open for about a week, and apparantly the birdses decided to make off with the whole darned thing! I've seen the cockatoos flying around with tree branches before, so I've no doubt they could make off with a small sunflower.

Cus, well, they are suckers for sunflower seeds!

Look! I even have a pic of the criminal Sarah Palin as she throws her arms up in the air and exclaims "But I thought it was Russia!"


I do have a pic of the snipped off stem of the sunflower, but I won't put a bloody, gory, graphic thing like that up on my blog...

I'm off bushwalking today, spring is FINALLY here! No more bloody freezing temps of 60's and 70's! This morning it was 81 F at 8:30 am so by this afternoon it should actually get a little warm :) Here's proof:



And on to other news...

Lance Armstrong is coming to town!!!!!!

I. WILL. BE. THERE.

And in other news...

We have 9 tomato plants in this year. Including a truss. Should have well over 300 tomatoes throughout the summer!!!! Drool...

Sarah Palin & Tina Fey Kissing!

Woo-Hoo! (As Homer would say). Yes, there's a little known fact that when Sarah Palin was at one of her many Northern Idahoan colleges she sorta partied... And she let everyone know she sure ain't flat busted!

Hmmmmm, looks like that pic has disappeared from google searches... Sorta like how all accountability and transparency has disappeared from the AK Governors office?

Ok, On With The Show! Here's the RED HOT pics of a NAKED SARAH PALIN playing tonsil hockey with a NAKED TINA FEY!!!

Oi! Guys: it just doesn't get any better than this!

First up, They Meet:


SP: *Ahhhhhh, it's like looking into a mirror! Gosh, how I love me!* "Hey babe, going my way?" *wink*

TF: *Oh dear god, what is this hell spawn I see? Shit, better play along cus she looks NASTY and MEAN!* "Oh baby, let's DO!"


Being a college party in the midwest, naturally some of the guys from the dorm start to show up...


And the night's partying continues as all the Palin voters show up...


And finally, the evening/morning comes to a climax as all the Palin voters show their True Rainbow Colors:

Sarah Palin's Bodyguard Attacks Photographer

I'd heard a rumour that Sarah Palin was really really pissed at Tina Fey! Now, this could come to blows as Sarah Palin was known to rat out her own teammates in High School, so I, being an intrepid paparazzi photo-journalist, just had to stalk her to get some pics of a Sarah Palin vs Tina Fey catfight!

Ha! How's that for a lead-in? Heck, I didn't have to go to 5 colleges to get MY photo journalism degree! Well, does ten years at one university count?

Ahem

I carefully stalked my prey... And then I found Sarah Palin and her husband, Todd Palin, in a conference. Could they be discussing State Business perhaps?

I slithered closer...

Then I overheard:

SP: That damn bitch Tina Fey!

TP: What's wrong honey? Would you like another foot massage?

SP: Damnit! She does a better "Sarah Palin" than I do!

TP: Yes, dear. Whatever you say.

SP: I HATE Tina Fey!

TP: I've just finished cleaning and oiling your hunting rifles.

SP: Oh, that's thoughtful dear. *pats TP on head*

SP: Aha! I know! I'll do an impression of Tina Fey "doing" Sarah Palin!

TP: Oh that's a another great idea of yours.

SP: Yes, I know. *smug grin* Now run along and play with your emails and the document shredder.

TP: Yes dear. Why did I marry her? Oh, right, I knocked her up... damn.

SP: TIME TO PRACTICE MY AIR GUITAR, BEYOTCH!!!!

By this time I was in the perfect position to take a picture of a NAKED SARAH PALIN as she practices her air guitar for her Tina Fey impression. Please note her husband is a dutiful two paces behind her.

Look at me! I can play air guitar better than Tina Fey!


All of a sudden, her GODLESS COMMIE RUSSIAN BODYGUARD that she befriended last episode rose up and demanded my camera!

Give me the camera and I'll only cripple you!


Then he charged me! Fortunately for me his pockets were filled with oil money which slowed down his charge and allowed me to escape.



I was lucky to escape with my camera and my life! Whew! The things I do for my fans...

Sarah Palin Naked In Action With Bodyguards

I awoke to the sound of a huge commotion happening outside! I grabbed the camera, then I remembered my robe (brrrrr, cold this morning), and I stealthily sneaked outside to get some illicit pictures of the ruckus...

sneak...

sneak...

sneak...

OW! stubbed me toe

sneak...


What did I see? I had stumbled into a SECRET MEETING with A NAKED SARAH PALIN SHOWING HER PINK BREASTS, HER NAKED HUSBAND, a whole buncha SECRET SERVICE BODYGUARDS, and a GODLESS COMMIE RUSSIAN SPY who was trying vainly to fit in!

WOW!!!! I've just got to get shots of this! Heck, The National Enquirer would pay biiiig money for these!

I slowly crept around the trees and bushes while keeping myself hidden. The wall of ferns growing between me and the secret meeting table made great camouflage...

First I got a shot of them all descending down to the TOP SECRET MEETING, the SECRET SERVICE AGENT was patrolling the perimeter, while a NAKED SARAH PALIN and her husband came (snicker) swooping in. I thought for sure they'd notice the GODLESS COMMIE RUSSIAN SPY SHE LIVES RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO, but they didn't:


As the meeting progressed, I got many candid shots, but then the SECRET SERVICE AGENT noticed me! He's the one on the upper right of the pic


Before I could be apprehended, the GODLESS COMMIE RUSSIAN SPY burst into the meeting! He cowered the NAKED HUSBAND OF SARAH PALIN, and then A NAKED SARAH PALIN herself swooped down to do battle!

Help me Sarah, save me with your sexiness!

With everyone frightened and run away, the NAKED SARAH PALIN then decided to have her way with the GODLESS COMMIE RUSSIAN SPY! Naturally, after she found out that the GODLESS COMMIE RUSSIANS have waaaay more oil that the US, she bowed down before the the BIG OIL KING!



Hmmmm, anyone know the email for The National Enquirer?

Can I be serious?

Why, yes. Yes I can be serious. I'm not all fun and games, jokes, laughs, stupid caption on animal pics, and smoke and mirrors.

However even when I am being serious, I do have to quote a comedian. Just cus.

I've been following the US economy for quite some time now... I'd like to say I'm shocked at what has happened (Crikey!!! Lehmann and Merril Lynch GONE with AIG next; shortly after Freddie and Fanny were *gasp* SOCIALIZED?!!!???!) but, sadly, I'm not. The reasons why I'm not surprised are many and I'm not going there right now. But I do have to give a shout out to the US'ns reading this (and here's where the comedian quote comes in):

"I'm pullin' fer ya. Remember, we're all in this together."

BTW the first person who correctly names the actor who said that line regularly will win a screensaver.

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And now, back to our regularly scheduled blog of Aussie animal pics with funny captions!


Hmmmmm, any chance the bank will foreclose on this house?


Wake me when it's time to vote; wouldn't want to miss it again!

Sarah Palin Naked In Pool With Boyfriend!

OMG! I just could NOT believe my eyes this morning! As I was feeding the parrots in the backyard this morning I heard a great commotion and splashing about coming from the pool. "What could it be?", thought I.

Were there fornicating teenagers in the pool (abstinance only really works for Bristol!)?

Was there another SARAH PALIN CATFIGHT happening and they fell into the pool?

Just how bloody cold is that damn pool water this morning?

No, none of the above. It was just Sarah Palin and her boytoy frolicking nakedly in the pool. Personally, I'dve thought the water would be too cold, but it sure did make some teats hard!

Here she is: Sarah Palin and her boyfriend swimming naked in my pool:

Sarah is on the right, the boytoy is on the left

And how's about an upclose picture of a TOTALLY NAKED SARAH PALIN SUNNING HERSELF on the side of my pool!


And let's not forget a closeup of SARAH PALIN'S NAKED BOYFRIEND

Awwwww, he looks so cute!



And lastly, a picture of a NAKED SARAH PALIN swooping down from THE HEAVENS to WREAK GOD'S OWN HAVOC UPON THE GODLESS COMMIE HORDES that she lives right next door to!

Photos of Eastern Rosella Parrots

Huh? Like, where the heck is the name Sarah Palin in the title of this post???? Well, I was gonna call this post SARAH PALIN SCREENSAVER (since LOTS of folks are looking for one via google searches), but I decided to wait till I've actually made a Sarah Palin Screensaver. Which I will be doing.

Just thought y'all might want a break...

Yesterday we went bushwalking. Saw loads of koalas (hence the post yesterday of a koala I named Sarah Palin in a tree with her baby), and an uncountable number of birds of many varieties. Lots of good pics, but we'll start with...

Eastern rosella parrots!

They nest in the hollows of older (or dead) gum trees. Fortunately, Australia has a rather large number of gum trees so there's plenty to choose from. I think this pair was doing a bunch of spring cleaning as the entire inside of this dead gum tree is hollow and they were going in and out every opening while chattering consantly.

This first pic is just one of them, at a huge opening around 15 feet up (tree was perhaps 18 feet high).


This next one has both of the rosella's in it, you'll see the tail of one of them sticking out about middle left. Also notice that you can see straight through the tree in three places. Old gums get hollow!


The last shot has both of them, but neither of them are facing the camera, damn! Why did I inculde this one? When you see the really awesome lens flare you'll know why! Absolutely NO touching up or photoshopping was done to this pic:



And remember folks: Don't worry, bee happy :)


I'm off for the day. Winter just might finally be over! It's 73 F in the shade and 95 F in the sun here at the ole homestead. Pool water temp is 70 F so there's a good chance I'll be getting wet today when it starts to get warm this afternoon.

Lot's of planting to do, tomatoes and sunflowers. Just to let you know, the self-seeding winter sunflowers are doing quite well but I don't think any of them will get over a meter high. I'm hoping for 2 meters off the ones I'll be planting today. Also got a lot more tomato plants this year so I'll be hoping for at least 200. Hmmmm, still got a jar of last years pickled green ones...

And I'm sure everyone will be happy to know that the grape vines are already sprouting this season's leaves so they made it through our icy-cold winter with no worries. I know that'll set your minds at rest...

Sarah Palin Naked In Tree With Baby

Since my best blogging mate, Ishmael, way up north in Alaska doesn't feel that I've gone overboard with all this naming of various wildlife Sarah Palin, I thought I'd upload a photo I shot just today showing a Totally Naked Sarah Palin In A Tree Holding Her Baby!!

Now how does that Tom Petty song go? I'm a baaaad boy...

Get ready guys!
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Keep a hand towel handy!
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Here it is!
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Scroll down!
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Keep going!
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Are you getting excited yet guys?

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And here it is!



Ahhhhhhh, what a release from the suspense, eh?

I took this pic of momma and baby koala about 5 hours ago out bushwalking, BTW. Cute little buggers.

Red Hot Naked Sarah Palin Action Pictures!

Woo-Hoo! I've got 'em! Yessireee! Just what y'all rednecks want! Totally naked pics of Sarah Palin in action! One of the pics is even a NAKED CATFIGHT!!

The other two pics show her viciously defending her territory from a gang of commie russkie thugs!! NAKED! Arms overhead and breasts out there for all to see!!!

Gosh guys, it just doesn't get any better than this, eh?

Oh, ummmmm, hang about... Ahhh, y'all might want to know that I've named one of the galahs that likes to hang around in our backyard... I've named her Sarah Palin. Sarah Palin has a lovely pink breast... :)

And here's the first picture of a Sarah Palin CATFIGHT where she gives a beat down to anyone who stands in her way while totally NAKED!


And next we see a NAKED SARAH PALIN courageously defended ALASKA from the terrible, GODLESS, RUSSIAN threat! All by herself; totally NAKED!!!!


And finally, we see a NAKED SARAH PALIN driving off the godless forces of evil and making the world a safe place for oil companies!


Ummmm, did I just go a weee bit overboard?

Bloody Cold Winter Weather!!!!

Bah! Crikey, mate. Can't wait till spring is here! Blech! This cold has JUST GOT TO STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I mean, c'MON! 'ere it 'tis, lunchtime... and the SHADE temp is only a bloomin' 72 F?! I mean, like WTF????? Sun temp has only JUST now got(ten) (thanks Sarah Palin) over 100 F. Water temp in the pool is a bloody ICY COLD 68 F!! I mean, C'MON! How can any bloke be expected to work in these conditions?

Blarf, phloog, blargle-doop!

Sigh...

Nothing left 'cept to go for a swim in the FROZEN pool! Sigh... I hope the parrots don't dive bomb me much this arvo...

Dang, bloody-well glad winter is over! Can't wait for it to start to think about maybe warming up a wee bit!!!!!!

Ssssssssiiiiiiiiiiiiiiggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...........

Oi! When's it gonna warm up?

Hey now! Just don't call my mom any mean names!

UPDATE: Bleah... 75 is the shade... Dang happy to finally be able to take the jacket off and not have to wear boots!

UPDATE: One of my self-seeded sunflower plants (that seeded itself in the middle of winter in a pot with one of my palm trees) is getting ready to flower. Here's a pic of the early bud, you can see the yellow on the flower already. Please notice the fuzz on the bud... even the sunflowers are felling the COLD!

Sarah Palin Is Coming To Git Ya!

Watch out ISH! Sarah Palin is coming fooooorrrrr yoooouuuuuuurrrrrrrr ssssoooooouuuuulll!!!! Just like the Dread Pirate Roberts


I'm gonna get you little Ishy
I'm gonna eat you little Ishy


In answer to your question: Why, yes. Yes I was watching Red Dwarf last night.

Did anyone notice how fat Sarah Palin (the galah) is getting lately?

Or is it just me?

Revealing Sarah Palin Pics

Yes, that's true! I have revealing Sarah Palin pics. I've decided to name my new girlfriend Sarah Palin. That means whenever I post a pic of her showing her pink breast I get to say I have naked Sarah Palin pics! Pretty shrewd, eh?

Do you remember that galah, the one who's been hanging around the yard eating all my sunflower seeds while batting her eyelashes at me and flaunting her feminine wares in my general direction?

So, here's the two pics of a completely clothless (NAKED) Sarah Palin:



Don't y'all just love it when I share?

Sarah Palin, I Have Two Wieners

... from my song contest. Oops! Typo in the title of this post. Sorry, it's supposed to be "winners", not "wieners". And how the heck did Sarah Palin's name get in the title --again. Darned gremlins!

Before I tell you about the song and who won, how's abouts I put up a picture of a naked, colorful gal. No, not Sarah Palin.


The turtledoves are darned common down here so I usually don't even bother photographing them. In fact, this one happened to fly in to the area I'd pre-focused on to get one of the rainbow lorikeets in flight. The lories have a darned fast wingbeat and pre-focusing on a spot is a good way to get good pics of them. Of course, then you've got to wait for one of the little green buggers to fly through your focus area...

The contest winners are Ishmael from Kodiak, Alaska and Cathy from Kotzebue, Alaska (she's Tundra Tantrum and I'm jealous of her camera). Now, I'm not surprised at all that Fishmeal would know the song, but I was surprised that Cathy knows it. Maybe it gets lots of airtime in rural Alaska? Or perhaps it was played at the local Freaker's Ball, held recently in Ester?

What was the song? Well it was I Got Stoned and I Missed It by Dr.Hook and The Medicine Show. I'm not sure if it came out before they shortened the band name to Dr. Hook or not --my memory is a little bit suspect from back then. It's rather funny, wouldn't be surprised to hear that ole Dr Demento aired the song.

So here's the deal for Ish and Cathy: Rummage through my archives, pick your ten most favorite pics and I'll make a screensaver of them (windows only, sorry). OR select 10 pics and I'll make wallpapers from the original files sized for your screen. This is open to negotiation, BTW. My email is

alaskandavedownunder(at)gmail(dot)com

So, does anyone have any ideas for another contest?

A Hint, Critters, and Sarah Palin

Hmmmm, let's play Sesame Street again! One of these things just doesn't belong (y'all remember the song, of course you do!). Now let's me think... ooo, could take a while... Ahhh! Right! Any mention of Sarah Palin just doesn't belong on this blog. Whew, glad I got that out of way.

What's the hint about? Scroll down to the previous post about a song title. Remember, whoever can give me the name of the band and the song title will get a custom screensaver of my parrot pics, or wallpapers of them.

So, ummmmm, what's the hint? I have several:

1) One of the few successful bands with TWO lead singers.

2) Think 1960's

3) The first line of the song is (with no accent or inflection) "I was sitting in my basement..."

C'mon all you old hippies! You've only got 9 more days.

And now on with the Aussie critter pics!

This first one I thought of calling A Cacophony Of Color. I then I thought of A Galah Looking Up The Lorikeet's Skirts. So which is it?


Just tossing this next one up cus I think it's looks so cool.


Is it ALIVE?


Why yes, yes it is alive --barely!


Massive hangover:

Ooooohhhhh, I've GOT to remember not to mix beer and wine, EVER!

...Oh Me Oh My...

Yes, I missed it. The Sarah Palin bounce, that is. Heck, I didn't even k(no)w how to pro-noun-ce her name! Sorta like Valdez, Valdez, Valdez --three(3) pronounciations depending on where you are from. In Castellano, it'd be pronounced as Valdeath. Fitting, eh? Anywho, I only doubled my traffic yes(turd)ay. Or was it the day before? Whatever, I missed it!

I promise never, ever, ever again to pander to the LCD in order to get traffic. There. Those crystals should be safe now that I'm not pandering to them no more.

Back to the topic... what topic? Oh, yeah. THAT topic.

If anyone can tell me what song the title of this post is yanked from, then I'll give you something. Free. On me. No worries. Now, I wouldn't be surprised that the title of this post has somehow mistakenly found it's merry way into other songs over the ensuing decades (is time linear?); but there's one song I'm thinking of...

Go ahead: guess! I want the name of the band and the song title. I'll even give you a hint: reread the first paragraph of this post.

What will you get? I'll make a custom screensaver of any 10 bird pics (you get to pic them) that have appeared here. I can only make them for PC, so for mac users I'll make fullsize wallpapers from the original files.

How do you enter? Just put your guess in the comments on this post, no worries.

What if no one wins? Tough shit, but I might award something for the funniest comment (judged by yours truly, of course) if no one guesses right. Y'all gots till September 15th (aussie time, HA!) to get your guesses in.

And now for the (w)hole reason why everyone visits me:



Oops, blurry again... I was focused on the galah as she was about to fly off and the lorie flew in. Sigh... I've got better ones, REALLY!

Sarah Palin

is NOT the subject of this blog post. She does however have a semi-secret admirer/wannabe boytoy in Kodiak, Alaska. I just thought that since I'd lived in Alaska over a 5 decade span that perhaps I should say something about her. There, I said it.

The above is my political statement for the decade.

Now, on with the birdie pics! Do you ever wonder what type of food cockatoos LOVE? Well, they'll tear an almond tree to shreds in 30 seconds flat --I've timed it. The flock descends upon an almond tree just as the almonds are about to ripen. The shells still have their green fuzz on them, and the almond is nice and chewy. Here's proof:

Here he is doing the canoe job on the almond:


Those are big claws...


Where's my bib?


Very interesting tongue...



If you don't get that camera out of my face then this will be your finger!

Round two:

This is MINE! You can not have it!